Why, in an era marked by information overload and hyper-connectivity, do so many people feel increasingly disconnected from themselves? This is the question that drives *The Ego Is Not Your Enemy*, the new book by economist, entrepreneur, and writer André Neves, which proposes a provocative inversion: instead of fighting the ego, learn to educate it and integrate it as an ally in the process of expanding consciousness. Inspired by the Bhagavad Gita, the work constructs a symbolic dialogue between the Ego and the Higher Self, guiding the reader on a journey that unites spirituality, self-knowledge, and practical life experience.
Based on more than 30 years leading a company that at its peak employed 1,500 people, André Neves transforms his experiences in the corporate world—including a profound business collapse—into reflections on loss, vulnerability, human relationships, and inner reinvention. In the book, themes such as free will, the culture of fear, divine justice, and mindfulness are interwoven with 50 self-awareness practices, reinforcing the idea that happiness is not a destination, but a consequence of living in harmony with one’s own essence. *The Ego Is Not Your Enemy* thus emerges as a sensitive and transformative invitation for those seeking to exchange control and recognition for presence, purpose, and unconditional love.
The book suggests that the ego, far from being a villain, can function as a “master in disguise.” At what point in your personal journey did this perception cease to be theory and become lived reality?
The ego is our guardian, the guardian of our individuality. When we remove the duality between spirit and matter from our way of seeing things, it becomes easy to understand that the soul chooses the path we take. Either it has already acquired enough wisdom not to surrender to the impulses of the ego, or it still submits to its will.
I went through a very challenging time in my life when I was removed from the management of the company I helped build and worked for for 30 years. It was a period of much introspection, reflection, and reading. During this time, I began to question this duality. It started to make no sense to me. I saw people raised in the same environment with completely different worldviews and views of others.
Reflecting on life, I understood that it is the souls that guide us. What quantum spiritualism calls the observer. When we deal with people, we classify them as good or bad, but when it comes to the soul, with all the eternity that surrounds it, we don’t classify it; we only understand that each one is in a distinct moment. The ego only wants to protect us; the soul understands how far protection goes without turning into a dispute.
You went through a business collapse that, according to you, was a gateway to self-discovery. What hurts more: losing something built over decades or admitting that your own identity was tied to those achievements?
Indeed, it was a painful moment in my life. I see it as a change of cycle, and all change comes with pain. I often say that pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. When I look back, I see that the corporate world no longer pleased me as before, but if it were up to me, I would have planned an organized exit, not a collapse. In my view, changes don’t happen as we plan; they simply occur when we have already fulfilled the lessons learned from the situation or place we were in.
Therefore, I don’t see pain in my identity being tied to my achievements, because I wasn’t attached to positions or titles. The loss itself caused me more pain, but not exclusively because of the financial aspect of the situation, but because of what was to come. I had a very intense work routine, about 14 hours a day, and the loss of that routine was quite difficult. It gave me a feeling of not being useful, and that, within the formation of my ego, was quite difficult. Until I left the company, I had a habit of overcoming challenges every day, and convincing myself that life can be more peaceful than that took me several therapy sessions.
In the symbolic dialogue between Ego and Higher Self, which of the two voices was more difficult to translate into writing—the one that confronts or the one that welcomes?
Deep down, I realized that the voice that confronts also welcomes, like a father or mother who educates with love. Saying “no” is often harder than saying “yes,” but it’s precisely “yes” that offers the truest acceptance.
Still, if I had to choose, I’d say the most challenging to translate was the confrontational voice. My nature is more welcoming, and placing myself in that confrontational position always requires a greater effort.
We live hyper-connected and, paradoxically, increasingly distant from ourselves. In your view, what is the main noise of this era that prevents people from listening to their own souls?
Hyperconnectivity has distanced us from people. We have drastically increased interaction, but it is so superficial that we become more isolated. People need people. When we begin to consider that a device in our hand replaces physical contact, we consider ourselves self-sufficient, and this goes against human nature. By fleeing from our essence, we also distance ourselves from our Higher Self.
In my view, immediacy is what has distanced us most from our souls. We want everything yesterday, we don’t have the patience to watch videos longer than a minute, and that time is decreasing every year. We no longer notice those around us, much less ourselves, our feelings, our inspirations. We are living on autopilot.
Among the 50 practices proposed in the book, which one do you consider the most challenging for yourself to date—and which one has most transformed your way of life?
The 50 practices came largely from self-observation and paying attention to people. During my sabbatical, I made it a habit to analyze my thoughts and feelings. I began to see patterns in each of them and realized that they are all creations of our minds. By changing patterns, we change our perception of the outside world and thus change our lives. We have the feeling that life is what happens around us, but in reality it is only the interpretation we give to what we are observing.
But to list the one that transformed me the most, it was the first. When I started seeing life through the lens of the soul, everything changed in meaning. Much of what I took very seriously was relegated to the back burner. And issues that I didn’t consider important came to the forefront.
My biggest challenge is still the 7th, total surrender. Not wanting to control anything. I’ve improved a lot since I realized that life doesn’t happen as we imagine, that our plans don’t work. But I still have a long way to go. Our ego is full of beliefs that we’ve assimilated along the way, and nullifying their influence on our feelings requires time and patience.
His experience working with 1,500 employees gave him daily contact with human conflicts, fears, and expectations. What lessons from the corporate world surprised him most when they began to intertwine with philosophy, positive psychology, and spirituality?
I had a very close relationship with the people I worked with, especially at headquarters, where I was based and there were 900 of us. Three years before I left the company, I developed, together with HR, a program to foster good relationships among people, in which I personally managed some meetings and informal chats. I learned a lot about people during that period.
Absenteeism due to psychological problems has been increasing dramatically in recent years. Brazil is the number one country in the world for anxiety and is among the top 5 with the highest incidence of depression. Companies and the Ministry of Labor see burnout as a consequence of work-related stress, but in my view, its root lies in our current way of life, in hyper-connectivity and the distancing from our essence, which you mentioned in a previous question. The cause is the same as for anxiety and depression.
It was through talking to people that I realized the company alone couldn’t fill that gap. The corporate world is cold. A company can’t have feelings. Its objective is profit and growth, and in my view, it has to be that way; it’s its role in the world. Companies want their employees to be well so they produce more and to project an institutional image that shows they care about their team.
But companies are perfectly positioned to foster this feeling among people. To lead them to reflect on their behaviors, on the attention they give to their colleagues, on kindness, on empathy, in short, on everything that philosophy and spirituality teach us. It is in this environment, of one supporting the other, that I see the solution, not only for the work environment, but also for the personal lives of each employee. To take them out of autopilot.
The Bhagavad Gita is a profoundly symbolic and spiritual text. How was it to adapt this ancient structure into a contemporary narrative, aimed at readers who deal with anxiety, overstimulation, and pressure to be productive?
The interesting thing is that nothing has changed in these 2500 years. Human nature is the same. The internal conflicts that tormented us are the same ones. The setting has changed, perhaps the external challenges – they were more physical and now they are more mental – but the main challenge is the same: to overcome the impulses of our ego. Arjuna’s enemies continue to torment us.
All the pressure and anxiety stems from our need to be better than others, to have more possessions, to have more achievements, always something more than others. This need inflates selfishness, envy, anger, lack of empathy, and all of this, packaged in current consumerism, generates anxiety and depression.
The book positions human relationships as the purpose—not as a means. In a society that values quick results and metrics, how do you see the challenge of teaching that true success lies in the quality of encounters, not in the magnitude of achievements?
People are very needy, trying to cling to something that gives meaning to their lives. I see many people talking about positive thinking, techniques to attract money, and escaping toxic people. There are many techniques and promises, which in my view are like throwing gasoline on a fire. The message is always the same: follow the manual and you will be happy. Happiness is a consequence, not an off-the-shelf product. All of this is becoming very tiring and inefficient. People are so tired and just want to surrender to something that makes sense.
The problem isn’t external; it’s within ourselves. When we nurture the belief that our lives would be perfect if it weren’t for our neighbor, we are fostering competitiveness.
When a person realizes that they only need to be better than they were the day before, that no one is here to hurt us but rather is facing the same struggles and difficulties as we are, life becomes lighter. In my view, that’s what’s missing: lightness in living. Letting go, welcoming what comes and who comes to us.
Follow André Neves on Instagram